Collection: Funny/Witty

Father's Day Card | I love that we don't even have to say out loud that I'm your favorite child

Dad, Thanks for Saying Yes Father's Day Greeting Card

Lazy is such an ugly word. i prefer the term selective participation.

Thanks for not selling me to the circus-Greeting Card

They say 'keep your chin up,’ but have you seen my double chin?-Greeting Card

They say birthdays are like boogers, the more you have, the harder it is to breathe-Greeting Card

i was under the impression getting older would take longer-Greeting Card

“no offense” means i’m about to insult you... but don’t get mad-Greeting Card

They say the older you get, the better you get... unless you're a banana. then you just get mushy-Greeting Card

When you really want to slap someone... do it... and say MOSQUITO!-Greeting Card

Well, you can now cross dying young off your list of stuff to worry about-Greeting Card

If we are not meant to get a midnight snack, why is there a lightbulb in the fridge?-Greeting Card

Wrinkled was not one of the things i wanted to be when i grew up-Greeting Card

Life is short. smile while you still have teeth-Greeting Card

My train of thought derailed...there were no survivors.

They say time flies when you’re having fun...and apparently it also flies when you’re just procrastinating

They say you’re not old until the fat lady sings...but i think she’s warming up.

Light travels faster than sound. this is why some people appear bright until they speak

They say you should embrace getting older... but i think i’ll just embrace the cake instead.

You know you’re old when you go to bed at the same time when you used to go out.

Sorry, i couldn’t afford an expensive card...i’m not broke, i’m just pre-rich- Greeting Card

Getting older is like living in a symphony of snaps, crackles, and pops card

Mirrors can't talk...lucky for you, they can't laugh either Card

They say age is just a number, but in your case, it's more like a mathematical conundrum greeting card